Midnight Thoughts

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I’ve been thinking and wondering
Of the things I’ve said, and of the things you’ve said.
Did I hurt you? Or it was you who hurt me?
You silenced yourself without a clue,
You walked away with no words on queue.

I stayed and said that I don’t care,
I stayed but didn’t gave a stare.
Did I just lost you?
Or it was you who lost me?

I pretend that everything is alright,
I pretend to smile so bright.
Can we start to pick up our broken pieces?
Or be broken and let our friendship end?

It’s a mess when we act like a stranger,
And a nobody when we see each other.
You said that it would be better to be this way,
And let time heal our wounds of yesterday.

Well then my friend, if this is your stand,
Take care of yourself and be glad.
I know someday you will remember my dear,
That I’m still here, waiting for you to be near.

Journey to Chapter 31: The Gift of “Tamang Panahon”

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After the #30Daysto30Years last year, I think it’s fun to begin another counting to another year – The Journey to Chapter 31. In this series of posts, let me share with you the 31 beautiful gifts that I received, and will receive on my 31st year – life lessons, inspirations, people and everything that came from above. | 20/31

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October 24 is a remarkable date for me.

First, let me say that I am an AlDub fan. This day, after three months of the highs and lows of their love story, is tagged as the “Tamang Panahon” for the two spilt-screen lovers–Maine Mendoza and Alden Richards finally had their first dance, first hug and their first closest encounter in front of fifty five thousand people at the Philippine Arena (the largest indoor arena in the world) and in front of those people here and abroad. And indeed, the show Eat Bulaga in their 36 years has given their audience this kind of viewing without commercial break! Add to another historical note as the #ALDubEBTamangPanahon recorded 41+ miliion tweets which made it the number one holder of most tweets in just 24 hours! Imagine that! I got so much kilig! And if you watched it, alam mo na yun hihihi πŸ™‚

Okay. So kilig aside, as I was saying, October 24 is a remarkable date for me because for months that I’ve been praying to God to lead me to a better job, He answered me unexpectedly..and His “YES” came on this day, on a tamang panahon! Woooh!

I wanted a new job badly. I was unlucky to get hired on the jobs that I applied for and this employer called me for an interview. I was bit confused then because I don’t remember applying for any position in their company. But I took the chance and went for the interview the following Monday. My confusion died off that time when I saw my printed resume I posted at Jobstreet. Ahhh. So that’s how they reached me! I was told to wait until Friday if I would get hired.

Friday came and I didn’t received any call from them. So I guessed that I am not the one that they are looking for and I started to think again on my next plan. Saturday came (October 24) while watching Eat Bulaga, I got a phone call saying that I am hired and that I could start reporting to work on Monday. Whew! Perfect timing!

I was so happy to get hired and I realized that God’s plan is much better than our plans. He really give us what we prayed for, on His perfect time, on an unexpected time. This gift might be simple, but for me who is jobless, this is such a great gift. The bottom line is, do not get tired of waiting for His answer.

 

 

 

 

Isolated.

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Yes, I’m back to this place on earth that I wish it never existed. Just walking thru the cold corridors and seeing the four green-colored walls make me sick. I don’t want to be here but I have to be here. I have no choice but to be here.

Inside this room I see some people looking at me and I thought, “Do they feel the same way as I do?” I can’t read the different expressions on their faces as I stepped into their territory. Am I welcome? Or are they telling me to go away?

Then I heard someone scream. A deep, scary voice.. Then a loud laugh. Who is it? I looked around but I can’t find the owner of that voice. Is it just my imagination? No. It sounds so real. And then there’s another scream. And another. And another. Now a loud chorus of laughter. It’s like their voices are on my ears. Am I the only one who hears them? Who are they? Where are they?

The unknown voices continued to play in my ears but somehow I recognized one familiar voice. I cannot be mistaken. But I wish I am wrong…

Is it my voice? Oh no! I am hearing myself. I panicked. Why am I screaming? Why I am screaming and laughing? Is there’s something wrong with me? I don’t understand the way I feel and I can’t control myself.

I see people dressed in all white approaching me. I don’t know anyone of them but I think they are talking to me but I can’t find any words to answer them. I just screamed as loud as I can and I can feel my throat is already hurting. Can someone stop me?

Then I felt a strong force pinning me down, I cannot move. There’s a pang of pain on my arm and I suddenly felt something weird. I can feel something is going through my veins and my whole body. I still can’t move and my eyes feel heavy. I still hear voices including mine until it started to fade away. I still see these people around me and the four walls of this room but afterwards they all went blurry. And everything went black.

I am back to this place.

A place on earth I wish it never existed. But it will continue to exist as long as I am here. I don’t want to be here and I don’t feel that I need to be here.

I have no choice but I have to be here.

To be in such an isolated place I wish never exists.

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